Regrets

Regrets don’t define me,

They have a conscience,

They remind me,

They refine me,

They guide me,

They adjust me,

Redesign me,

They find me,

Walk beside and behind me,

They change me for the better,

They wise me up,

They shake me awake,

They shock me real,

They turn me around,

They make me turn on my heel,

They drop the hints,

They push me forward,

They give me reality checks,

They give me the facts,

Behind the lies,

Behind the eyes,

I’ll never deny them, but,

They’ll fuck me up,

If I repeat them.

Reckoning

The day smothers me,

With a kiss of empty of promise,

The hours bleed out from the dawn,

Sunlight shifts across the sky,

Casting shade on my sorrow,

Blinding my eyes so I cannot see,

Unready for the reckoning, to come.

 

My stubborn heart,

Bends toward the day,

Seeking a fool’s reward,

For seeing through,

This list of disappointments,

Written in solitude,

I check the time,

Seconds tick by,

I remain, motionless.

 

A storm rages in my heart,

With each breath entering my lungs,

A violent pulse moves me,

Toward the inevitability,

Of day folding into the earth,

In her veil of black,

I am paralysed,

When the hungry earth,

Wraps me in her blanket of thorns.

 

Cold sweat,

Of the night terror remains,

Anxiety rushes through my veins,

Day pierces the shade,

I stare into the light of the sun,

Unready for the reckoning,

To come.